Romance Writing

You’ve met this absolutely fantastic person that you are crazy about.  You want to ask them on a date.  The only problem is that money is tight.  You wonder two things:  What can you do that won’t send you to the poor house but that both you and your date will enjoy, and what will your date think about you if you plan something frugal to do? 

Unfortunately there are a lot of people whose idea of a fun and romantic date is to spend money, a lot of money.  Some women have the idea that if a man doesn’t spend a great deal of money on her on a date, that he isn’t good enough for her.  Leave those women in the dust!  They aren’t good enough for you!  A fun and romantic date is not about money at all, but about just being with the person you care about.

There are a number of things a couple can do together that costs nothing or very little.  Just some ideas that your special someone is sure to enjoy with you are:

Order pizza (or better yet, make your own), rent a movie, and just stay home.  Nothing speaks romance as much as two people snuggled on a sofa watching a movie and eating pizza together.  And if you are watching by chance a scary movie, so much the better for cuddle time.

Pack a picnic basket and a couple of fishing poles and head for the lake for a few hours.  Fishing is fun, as long as you don’t freak out at having to bait the line or taking the fish off.  For the ladies, if you are prone to freak out, you have this big strong manly man there to help with things. And how much more romantic can it be than for your date to save you from the fish on the line?

Something that any man is sure to enjoy is a slow massage.  A massage helps to relieve stress and tension and it feels good.  While he watches a movie, get the massage oil and give his shoulders and back a nice slow rub down.  Take your time and give him a lot of attention. He might just enjoy the massage so much that he forgets he’s watching a movie.  If he starts to fall asleep, you are doing a great job.

There are a number of other things a couple can do together to have a fun and romantic date on a budget. The main thing to remember is that the date is about the two of you, not about money.  The fact is that if a person is only interested in you for the money you can spend on them, they simply are not worth your time.  Anyone that truly cares for you is not interested in what you will spend on them now or in the future, they are only interested in being with you. 

Dating can be fun and exciting, and can lead to more dates with a wonderful man.  But there are some things a woman just should not do if she hopes to have another date with that wonderful man.  Following are just a few tips on things that a woman should never do when on a date.

A woman should never nag a man.  Nagging a man has got to be the biggest turn off.  What man will want to go out again with a woman who nags him while dating him?  If she nags while on a date, what will she do if things became more serious?  Let the man be himself. You either like him just as he is or move on. Never be a nag!

Don’t spend the entire date talking about your ex boyfriend.  If all you do is talk about him, that only tells the man that he is on your mind just a wee bit much.  Not only does it make you insensitive to your date, chances are he isn’t going to want to date you again to listen to more drama.  Leave the talking about the ex boyfriend to share with your girlfriends.

Most women love to talk.  It seems to be part of being a female.  But it’s not a good thing to hog the conversation when dating.  Most likely your date will be bored quickly when he is unable to get a word in because you won’t stop talking long enough to let him get a word in edgewise.  Instead of constantly talking, close the mouth, open the ears, and listen to him.  Not only will you learn more about your date, he will probably feel a lot more appreciated because you actually take the time to listen to him instead of constantly talking.

Don’t try to be someone or something that you are not.  Don’t lie to your date and don’t be dishonest with him.  If the date turns into something more serious at a later time, you’ve got some explaining to do when it’s discovered that you were not honest to begin with.  Rather than take the chance of losing what could be a good thing, just be yourself from the beginning and be honest. 

Stay off the cell phone with your girlfriends while on a date.  Don’t be so inconsiderate while on a date with a man and make him feel left out because you can’t stay off the phone while with him.  Either leave the cell phone at home or turn it off.  You are on a date with this wonderful man, not your cell phone.

Don’t expect your date to be a mind reader.  Say what you mean and mean what you say.  If you won’t say what you are thinking or feeling, he isn’t going to magically know what’s going on inside your head. 

One of the main quests in life for a woman is to find the right man that she can not only love but be happy and content with, and actually like.  Fishing for a man can bring in a lot of catches on the hook, but most need to be thrown back in, not because of any flaw on the man’s part, but because they simply are not right for you.

In order to be successful in finding the right man, a woman first needs to know herself and she needs to love herself.  Loving yourself is paramount to a relationship working out.  Knowing who you are, your likes and dislikes, your feelings about various things, and your own personality are key factors necessary  for a healthy relationship. Generally speaking, you want a man that matches your personality. 

That sounds easy enough, but it’s not that simple.  Too often both men and women bottle up their emotions, their feelings, their thoughts.  Maybe it’s for fear of rejection, maybe they are afraid to share how they truly feel, maybe they don’t even know how to share, maybe they are just scared to love again after past hurts.  Whatever the reason, in order for a relationship to work, both parties have to be open and be themselves so that who they are shines through, rather than hidden behind a wall.

The kind of man you want should be someone that accepts you for who you are and loves you as you are.  He doesn’t want to change you.  He doesn’t criticize your looks. He doesn’t make you feel inferior or that you aren’t good enough. He loves you as you are, loves your personality, loves everything about you.  He is open and honest with you. He won’t tell you what you want to hear, he will tell you the truth.  He’s understanding and considerate, and he listens when you share your intimate thoughts and feelings with him.

The next thing to consider when fishing for a man is everyday life.  A woman should look for a man that she can share daily life experiences with.  If you aren’t whatsoever into outdoor activities, chances are that you will not be happy with a man that lives to camp, fish, hike, or climb mountains.  If you absolutely love the opera and he hates it, that’s workable.  If you cannot live without making every opera ever performed, and he hates it, you might want to look for a man that loves the opera.  If he loves home cooked meals and you are allergic to the kitchen, you might want to look for a man that is into takeout and eating out.  If you want wild monkey sex every single day and think sex is all there is to life and  he isn’t all that into sex, you might want to look for a monkey instead of a man.

Compatibility is necessary for a happy and healthy relationship.  But to be compatible, you simply must know yourself and be yourself.  Being true to yourself will allow you to hook the right man, the one that is compatible with your personality. 

We all want to be loved and accepted.  But too often we want it so bad that we settle for anyone, even if we love them and they love us.  Unfortunately, just loving someone isn’t a reason to marry them.  The reason is that even though it might be love, if the personalities clash, it won’t last.  A woman wants to find a man that fits her.

While there are always exceptions to this, in general a woman wants to fish for a man that is a fit for how she thinks and feels, that loves her for who she is in all ways, that has the same likes and dislikes for the most part, that she can share her intimate thoughts with, and that she can trust.

If however you are only fishing for a man that’s got money and material things, it’s best to throw the fishing pole away right now.  The last thing a woman should ever do is look for a man to take care of her financially.  That is the most wrong reason there can be to look for a man.  If you’re not in it for love and for the man, don’t be in it.  Not only is it wrong, it’s not going to work.  Men shouldn’t be used or hurt, and to want one only so that he will take care of you is just plain wrong.  Money can be gone in a heartbeat, and it doesn’t keep you warm at night like love does.

On the other side of the coin is the man that only wants a woman for her looks.  If the man you are interested in is only into looks and uses you for a trophy on his arm, throw him back and look for one that loves the real you, the real you that’s underneath the skin.  If he doesn’t like who you are as a person, throw him back and look for one that loves you for you.  Looks fade, but real beauty stays because it’s underneath the skin.

In order to hook the man that’s right for you, get to know yourself. Go fishing for the man that makes your heart smile, that is always there, that loves who you are, that makes you laugh, that’s honest with you, and that know how you like your chocolate.